A satirical YouTube video has landed an American comedian a one-year sentence in a United Arab Emirates (UAE) prison. Unsuccessful Thug is about growing up black in America, facing down racism in Hollywood, and ultimately how it feels to fail at thugdom, pull yourself up by the bootstraps, and end up selling out arenas and starring in movies across the ... Nazar Mohammad, better known as Khasha Zwan — a popular Afghan comedian active on TikTok — didn't trust the Taliban to act like civilized people. Doesn't hurt. 10. If only the words behind, "sticks & stones" were true. Charlie Murphy: 8/10 He would shoot right up the hierarchy. Chris Hardwick: 2/10 OK, this is no surprise here. He has won six Primetime Emmy Awards during his career, and is also a Peabody Award recipient. Touring in Myanmar meant literally going village to village, but when the military leaders saw a video of the act's performance for thousands of people, the brothers were arrested and sentenced to five years of hard labor. Found inside – Page 18While he waited in jail to be released , he tweeted about the experience and ... Ali Baba , who is regarded as the godfather of Nigerian comedy , has been ... Nick Swardson: 5/10 Would find his group. Dark introspective nights of the soul. Fellow inmates would assume he was mugging tourists in lower east side alleys for dope money. His intentions and appetites alone keep him from a perfect score. If he could whether the initial storm he could settle into a groove. For my kids’ sake, as well as my own, I am determined to succeed.” Poundstone took a plea deal which gave her probation instead of more than a decade of prison time. Moshe Kasher: 5/10 From Oakland. Jerry Seinfeld: 1/10 Fish out of water. Adam Sandler: 9/10 If I had only seen his comedies I would’ve scored him lower. Tom Segura: 7/10 His Spanish would help. Here are the most shocking crimes comedians got arrested for. Would fit in. I think he'd opt to give coin over plasma—until he couldn't. Understandable. Prison can tough for gay men. Likely be one of the guys constantly drinking spud juice. Christopher Titus: 8/10 Wouldn't be out of place; Blue collar. I want to hate him so much but I can't. Strict routine: writing, exercise, support system, and well-chosen friends. Larry David: 4/10 I almost went 2/10, but I could picture LD finding the most powerful and respected goon and lining his pockets. APRIL 19--Comedian Chris Tucker was briefly jailed Sunday morning after Georgia cops pulled over … "Once a year they censor your material, and then you have to stay with what they have approved," explained famous former Soviet — now American — stand-up comedian Yakov Smirnoff to the Chicago Tribune in 1985. Too big to be an easy victim. There are guys like him in here, but funnier. Relatable. Quick wit. Actors and actresses earn a lot of money for their …, Literacy is one of the most important educational tools imaginable. He was sentenced to 18 years in prison, probably for two songs called "Qerindashlar" and "Essalamu Eleykum," meaning "family" and "peace to you," respectively. Problems arise. They won’t allow him to evade his Twitter and Facebook bans by being a constant image on a 24-hours news station. Bill Byrge. More than 120,000 buildings fell, 15,000 people were left homeless, and nearly 16,000 people died. Helps. Comedians In Prison; How your favorite standup comics would fare in the world of prison. Munawar is a handsome guy, too. His caliber of humor is so perfectly suited to win people over in here. A punk rock type of comedy. There's work to be done; extensive, labor intensive, meaningless, work to be done. Just immature homophobia & unwanted advances. Attitude & demeanor alone would carry him. Telling jokes is a skill that humans might have developed to cope with terrible situations. Well, that mixed with his congenial nature and ability to deal with people. Jim Norton: 2/10 So self-deprecating and a genuine sweetheart that, unless he's looking to become a front-facing human belt buckle for a larger, more violent(meaning any) inmate, should head to PC. "Although he was acquitted, law enforcement agencies put him under greater scrutiny, leading to trouble for Bruce everywhere he went," explains Middle Tennessee State University's Free Speech Center. Andrew Dice Clay: 2/10 At 1st glance his overly tough persona would give pause to predators. Somewhat coordinated, but doubt it. We'd hang. They say they were old and infirm, maybe mentally handicapped, but still...Those of you who've been lucky enough to get tickets to a live show know that you have to sign a waiver to sit in the first ten rows. Carlin also ended up joining Bruce as one of the most influential stand-up comedians of the 20th century, garnering 17 Grammy nominations along with many other awards, according to his IMDb page. (image via https://twitter.com/salenagodden), Lead (Photo by Carlo Allegri/Getty Images). "Since India's independence, Muslims have faced systematic discrimination, prejudice, and violence," explains the Council on Foreign Relations. Jo Koy: 7/10 Many Asians default towards urban/hip hop culture which makes it easier to fit into prison. Don't do it Dov. Drunk dad. Lenny Bruce was a stand-up OG, a man who pushed the envelope and frequently paid the price. Copy Link URL Copied! Kyle Kinane: 6/10 Looks the part. Could interact with many groups but ultimately sit back and observe, working on material. Sadly, some of the comedians featured on this list have passed on. He'd end up in higher level prisons. ... “A comedian has … Raspy voice would help cover story as a drug user or grizzled biker. He'd have to show edge, I'm not sure he has, to counterbalance his uber white privilege. And, if he had to, he'd fight. But although this danger peaked under Stalin, Graham said Russian citizens were always at risk of "being sentenced to prison for telling anti-Soviet jokes." We previously discussed the prosecution of controversial French comedian Dieudonné M’Bala M’Bala for antisemitic jokes and comments. “Politics can … He would ultimately come out good, with a better perspective. Plus he's Muslim. This lifestyle is all-encompassing. Bobby Lee 5/10 My Korean brother. Aziz Ansari: 7/10 Small enough that he'd fall into the anybody-pressing-him-is-an-asshole category. Demetri Martin: 5/10 I know someone similar to Demitri. The stand-up comedians feel prisons in India are the safest place on earth. John Belushi: 8/10 Magnetic. Radio presenter and comedian Davis Mwabili alias Inspekta Mwala has been sentenced to serve a year in jail or pay a fine of Ksh30,000. explained The Jerusalem Post. He'd change his tough New Yorkers bit to tough inmates. The next level … He could sit at my table. Pissed off enough to keep predators at bay. "I'm not a comedian..." he was quoted as saying to an Australian magazine in "Revel with a Cause." Everyone would know he's in for stealing, not child molestation. We all keep shit to ourselves in here. Comedian Munawar Faruqui, a Muslim, was arrested in January in Indore, India, on charges of insulting Hindus. But Todd isn't a push over or easily pegged(poor choice of words). I'm an idiot. "TikTok is the second most hated community in this country," Frauqui quipped on stage, per Time. Can’t pull out his dick like he used to, though. There you go long haired, self-hating, Mexican...You're fucking famous now. Comedian Roy Wood Jr. Has A Funny New Show. Anyone who follows me on twitter knows this. The greasy bastard would live off red sauce, olive oil, and extorting his fellow inmates. The prisoner's Guide to Humor is an unusual book of jokes intended to bring humor into a setting of endless boredom. Greg Giraldo: 6/10 New Yorker. Even though they were allegedly preapproved by China's censors, the country's leaders apparently believe those are dangerous messages. Should head to PC. Dope would be his biggest struggle. So, without further adieu, here is the ever-evolving list of comedians and their 1-10 hypothetical projected survive/thrive-ability status while incarcerated. Harvey Weinstein: 1/10 What we call a good thing. Although political subject matter is by no means a requirement for anyeint troupes, Vulture says the "most popular ones are.". David Mann was born on August 7, 1966 in Fort Worth, Texas, USA as David Anthony Mann. Telling everyone to pull their pants up & stop using ebonics. Gritty east coast comic. Knows himself. White powder. The Jerusalem Post quoted British comedian Ricky Gervais' reaction to the verdict: "If you don't believe in a person's right to say things that you might find 'grossly offensive,' then you don't believe in freedom of speech." Found insideTwo years later in 1775, he produced The Barber of Seville, the comedy he had worked on in jail. The opening of the play was not a success, so Beaumarchais ... Which he'd undoubtedly fuck up and have to pay more. Mo'Nique touched on subjects like masturbation, marriage, men and having children and she interviewed some of the prisoners as well as visited the prison cells. Adam Carolla: 7/10 Grizzled, worked with hands, boxed, grew up poor; all beneficial. Physically fine. I'm sure the purists will find I failed. Dave's perpetual 5-o'clock hobo shadow mixed with a set of shitty state blues would have the same effect as a opossum playing dead. But still intelligent & intuitive enough to know when to turn it on & off. Not a predator’s first choice. "Today it's Danilo Gentili, a humourist hated by the left. #ComediansInPrison. Problems inevitably arise. And the two groups don't live in perfect harmony. His body in here, his mind would be in the world. The good news is that there are upcoming greatest comedians that will make you laugh even louder. Why These Comedians Got Arrested For Performing Their Act An Indian comic who didn't even make a joke was sent to prison. India is the world's largest Hindu-majority country, but... A Brazilian comic was jailed for insulting a politician. 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Even as he was being kidnapped and handcuffed in the back of a car with two men wielding AK-47s, Khasha Zwan's mockery wasn't finished — a widely shared video depicts him being repeatedly slapped and beaten for ridiculing his murderers. Intuitive. Will Sasso: 10/10 No one is pushing around Sasso. He was convicted of "humiliating a group of persons singled out on a national basis" and sentenced to 10 days in jail. Tony Rock: 8/10 A more popular inmate would pave the way for him on the yard, making his bid a lot easier than it would've otherwise been. Gotta go. Plus the Soon Yi things wouldn't go over as well here as it did in Hollywood. Andy Andrist: 10/10 You've heard of Pryor, Hicks, CK...all of them are just shit on the comedy boot heal of the Greater Of All Time: Andy Andrist. If he stayed in general pop, he'd find a few with similar interests (comic books). They are literally my favorite people in the world. Navarro confessed to getting a child involved in […] Anywhere. Bruce was a trailblazer in the field and helped steer the form towards more social commentary, away from canned jokes, and directly into controversy. Latin Counts, or Kings, Maybe Insane Spanish Cobras. He will be telling us how he ended up going to prison for steal $350,000 in wine! Would probably let this place get on top on him. Found inside – Page 150He'd never gone to jail because people respected him for his good whiskey. He carried his own snake, because we were a religious folk, and you didn't drink ... A native of Azerbaijan but with Belorussian citizenry, Mirzalizade talks a lot about his life as an ethnic minority and the details of racism and poverty in Russia. Would thrive. Bruce's stand-up career began the year after he was dishonorably discharged from the U.S. Navy. I see him breaking bread rather than fleeing to PC. My fellow Floridian has the underlying insanity, inherent of our state, ready to be unleashed. Raised around Florida insanity may help. Would be an inmate who clashed with administration more than fellow inmates. He has a confident fearlessness that I think would translate well. However, some countries — such as the U.S. and the U.K. — still refuse to use the new name, as nobody actually asked the people who live there. Would find his place. Mike Cannon: ?/? Why These Comedians Got Arrested For Performing Their Act. Censorship of the media — and especially comedy — is a Russian tradition that appears to be continued by current President Vladimir Putin. His smarts & a strategic face tat would give him the room to craft another literary masterpiece. Natasha Leggero: (?) Even his size wouldn't help The sooner he heads to PC the better. RIP. Comedian Artie Lange, who has been battling drug addiction for decades — most recently with the threat of jail time hanging over his head — says he is grateful for the concern of other comedians. According to The Moscow Times, Mirzalizade angered Russians online and in politics with a joke he made about Russian hotel rooms on YouTube. However, it would ultimately lead to altercations with REAL tough guys, real KILLERS. Read social situations. Nevertheless, a complaint was filed, and the FCC acted against the radio station, declaring the broadcast "indecent." Keith Robinson update: 8/10 Stroke brings him up a point. No problem finding a crew. “I had no intention of insulting anyone,” he said in court. He has, of course, been arrested multiple times since, most recently during a 2021 protest against the military coup earlier that year. Issuing notice to Madhya Pradesh on the comedian's … Pete Davidson: 6/10 Fatherless, tattooed, mental health issues. Look the part. He'd find his click and develop even thicker skin. Mumbai-based comic Munawar Iqbal Faruqui frequently used his Muslim heritage and community as a vehicle for his stand-up performances. Unable to cope. On his Facebook page, Dieudonne, simply stated, “Je suis Charlie Coulibaly“ (I am Charlie Coulibaly)” and was subsequently arrested by local authorities. This was the first time in contemporary Russia an individual had been put in prison for telling a joke. This was the first time in contemporary Russia an individual had been put in prison for telling a joke. Kevin Hart: 9/10 His melanin would balance out his height. In April 2008, Snipes was sentenced to three years in prison for failure to file his federal income tax returns. Found inside – Page 115The first time you go inside, they give you an orientation explaining that ... Maybe they're hoping the guys will forget they're in prison and just think ... Soviet-born director Michael Idov remembers how strange it was that "in a country where you pretty much couldn't joke about anything, some of the biggest celebrities were professional jokers. Since the group's takeover, they have reassured everyone that they've changed their barbarically homicidal ways since the last time they were in charge. However, not taking things seriously almost landed Pryor in some serious trouble. Dogs are given to the pound, and the pound kills them. Comedy is hard," goes the old saying (which is apparently difficult to source, according to Quote Investigator). Protective Custody. Two years ago, a group of comedians pulled an epic prank on one of their friends at the Arlington Improv. Redd Foxx: 6/10 Could see him as a semi racist Mo-Byte (sect of prison Islam). I simply have no credibility in this area. I’m in constant evolution and feel pity for those who do not embrace it, I will look, feel, sound, and think differently tomorrow than I do today…and for those who say I have changed, well…I have, change is my own personal freedom. He would have a ton of friends. Thrive even. Stout Italian. Name dropping Trevor Noah for "urban" street cred would lead to him spending most of his days explaining who Trevor Noah is. He'd be fine. Hardworking. Contemplative thinker. The author presents a collection of ways to reap the proven human and corporate benefits of humor at work, organized by core business skill and founded on his own work as a business speaker and coach with the consulting company, Humor That ... Found inside – Page 56Behind prison bars, Redd Foxx poses for JET before giving benefit ... I've been to Atlanta Federal, to prisons in San Francisco and to the one in Chicago ... Judd Apatow: 5/10 Would manage to fly under the radar, for the most part. Unsurprisingly, the comedian mocked them mercilessly. He is a hilarious people person who would have a ton of friends. Jon Stewart: 5/10 Out of his social element, his emotional and social intelligence would carry him. It might take a few lumps, but I think AJ would go to PC to safely roast fellow inmates. Unless the Latinos went to war, and he had to take part. He currently resides in Nashville. Found inside – Page 114Brooks announced he had made his own two-and-a-half-minute film on the history of the animal kingdom, but unfortunately, the film had been lost in the mail, ... 7. What he did instead was post a video of him tearing up the notice, cramming it down his pants, and profanely explaining exactly how he felt about the Congress and do Rosário. Would be loved by the ladies. Respect my brother! Iconic comedian Louie Anderson, the three-time Emmy®-Award winner, is one of the country's most recognized and adored comics; named by Comedy Central as "One of 100 Greatest Stand-Up Comedians of All Time." "I'm a surgeon with a scalpel for false values.". As the BBC explains, the name Myanmar — previously Burma — was decided by the country's ruling military decades ago after it quashed an uprising. But he's confident & in shape enough not to worry about being targeted. The Moustache Brothers is a political vaudeville act that has been touring for decades and is famous for its slapstick, magnificent lip-hair, and prison time. Undoubtedly, some of you will be outraged by the stand-ups I failed to include. Found inside – Page 172When dealing with mentally ill prisoners, I found that I could get along better ... that several of them had been comedians at some point in their lives. Louis CK: 7/10 Large in stature. It's stupid. Al Jazeera reported that during a wave of revenge killings, Khasha Zwan was snatched up and summarily executed by two members of the Taliban. Could figure out & exploit the culture. Well, no more than he does himself. Judah Friedlander: 4/10 He's already in here. All of these comedians would have great material. Dave Chappell: 8/10 Melanin makes prison life easier. I know nothing. His career has spanned more than 30 years. The director of Brazil's Human Rights Watch said in a statement critical of the decision, "No one should go to prison just because they said something offensive, no matter how distasteful their remarks." Milking a "disability" would give Keith so much more leeway with his shit talking. Especially if they were jokes he had removed from his/her act and never performed. Bill Hicks: 5/10 Brooding. Overly opinionated & irritable; would undoubtedly have to fight on occasion. That can be draining in here. Prison might've saved his life. Anthony Jeselnik: 2/10 Hitler's wet dream might have trouble. Controversial French comedian Dieudonne M’bala M’bala has been sentenced to two months in prison by a Belgian court for “inciting hatred” during a performance in the country. Beatings Extortion. And according to The Guardian, in 2017, the Brazilian Congress "ask[ed] him to remove offensive tweets about Do Rosário." But the wrong joke about the wrong subject or person could send the comedian — or anyone caught retelling the joke — to the gulags or worse. ... Yung Poppy has been in prison since 2020 Credit: Getty ... court documents revealed Poppy may have allegedly supplied the drugs that led to a woman's fatal overdose. I hate myself. The judges said … All this would culminate later that year at the Milwaukee Summerfest. Not kidding. Please throw a few lines in the Comments section below. Any square, middle-aged, well-fed, pasty white guy is under suspicion for being a sex offender. Woody Allen: 2/10 Annie Hall monologue to a non existing camera justifying his trip to protective custody—the safest place for him. Ralphie May: 6/10 Size would draw attention. In the summer of 1972, Carlin was arrested again for performing a comedy routine that was deemed obscene. They are sent to judicial custody till the 4th of December. Would say he banged Kate Beckinsale. However, when he wasn’t making people laugh, things were pretty serious for Carlin. RIP. When he was released in late 2020, it was on the stipulation that "he must report to a police station twice a week," Al Jazeera reports. All negatives. Do yourself a favor and check out a master at work https://iwapodcast.wixsite.com/issueswithandy …or get lost. Comfortable taking shit. Having to clean up for LD would be the toughest $ the goon would ever earn. Jeff Ross: 7/10 Again, east coast comic. Would actually fit in well. Since their release, they've been banned from performing anywhere but their own home for small groups of tourists. He would do better than fine in here. Worth it. Gentili's sentence was criticized by many in and out of Brazil. He is an actor and producer, known for Meet the Browns (2009), Meet the Browns (2008) and Madea Goes to Jail (2009). Other sources have claimed that the actor might be bisexual or transgender. Most recently, Russia cracked down on comedy with the arrest of Idrak Mirzalizade, who isn't even Russian. Harris Whittles: 6/10 Young & socially intelligent enough to figure out his place. Send hate mail to MDOC prison inmate #929141. East Coast comic. A representative of the Simon Wiesenthal Center remarked, "If I were the judge, I would sentence the young man to meet with aging Holocaust survivors and U.K. WWII war heroes to learn why the Nazi Seig should never be a laughing matter." Dane Cook: 6/10 Would get caught stealing, of course, and beaten into one of his twisted onstage contortions. Dennis Miller: 5/10 He'd find his rightwing crowd in here, but soon lose them when his obscure references made them feel stupid. He was particularly well-known for his regular guest appearances on the talk show Tough Crowd with Colin Quinn and the radio show Opie and Anthony.. Raised in the Boston area, O'Neal began his stand-up comedy career in 1992, … Mirzalizade's sentence was updated to deportation and a lifetime ban from the country, according to Belsat TV. And though some on the list will be more well know for other accomplishments, such as Judd Apatow for film making, most of these comedians have at least dabbled in standup at some point in their careers. They'd try to medicate him for hyperactivity. Nice guys, who look like nice guys, usually do finish last. Extra calories, a little weight pit, and he'd be fine on stature alone. Whether it's true or not is hardly important. Whatever Happened to The Cast of Beverly Hills 90210? A few days later, the comedian was attacked in a Moscow street. Blood or money. The rest follows. I sure hope we’d have a problem with a comedian being physically arrested for jokes today. Submit a Tip! In November 2020, Zaid was sentenced to six months in jail, and there's no word on whether his sentence was completed. ", Comedians may have been big stars, but they still had to work under the Soviet censors. In a country that traditionally doesn't even allow women to use their own names outside of the home, the Taliban is even more unforgiving in their interpretation of Islamic law. It's also home to the Uyghur people, who are an ethnic minority in China but the dominant group in Xinjiang. The court found Mwala guilty of causing death by dangerous driving in the accident which happened in August 2019. This is the only comic in the Comedians In Prison list with a score and summary longer than 280 characters. The 10 Best Jon Stewart Daily Show Moments of All-Time. Andy Kaufman: 6/10 The inter-gender wrestling champion of the world might stir shit up just out of boredom or the ultimate performance art. Still, his size and appearance would attract predators. Sarah Silverman: 10/10 Knowing nothing about female prisons, Sarah's the only female comedian I'm comfortable rating. I'll elaborate on the score when, and if, I make it out the other end. Bill Cosby has been released from prison after the Pennsylvania State Supreme Court issued an opinion to vacate his conviction on sexual assault charges. Mike DeStefano: 7/10 After adjustment period, he'd be fine. Read the room. The facial hair would help... but not enough to block a fist. Lil Wayne: Lil Wayne is another one of several celebrities to have been in prison after being caught with drugs. He's the only other comedy fan I could confer with at this joint when making this list. JONATHAN TURLEY — We previously discussed the prosecution of controversial French comedian Dieudonné M’Bala M’Bala for antisemitic jokes and comments. His cantankerous demeanor would lead to a few physical altercations, but he'd be alright. Still, he was arrested, convicted in 2018, and fined over $1000 for "grossly offensive" communication, also known as "hate speech.". A good bad influence. There’s no doubt that her history as affected her career, and she’s struggled to regain her footing since the incident. All names in alphabetical order by first name. This list and subsequent scale, though profoundly important and unquestionably accurate, is nothing more than the ramblings of an incarcerated comedy fan with nothing much else to do. I will also have butchered the spelling of many of these comedians names. I could see Schumer fitting right in, too in, like hilariously fast...I smell a blockbuster! Looks broish enough not to get pressed. Kinda. A younger Charlie Murphy fuck a lot of people up. Don't do it Brad. Apparently, Bruce was actually trying to raise the money to help his wife end her career as a stripper. Actor-comedian Mike Birbiglia, who most recently played a group counselor in the hit film The Fault In Our Stars(see this Inquisitr article), has signed on to take on a recurring role in the upcoming third season of Orange Is The New Black, Laugh Spin is reporting.. As of this post, it is not know exactly what role Mike will play on OITNB.Show runner Jenji Kohan is keeping Mike … They don’t want to elevate him again. I'd look past his love for Phish and we'd be inseparable. Has 23 yrs to figure it out. Richard Pryor: 2/10 Appetites too large for prison. Comedian Rod Man is truly a gem in the World of Standup Comedy today. Like in life, dope would be his biggest risk. Comedian Joe Machi has been highly secretive about his love life. As reported by Biography, the radio station advised the audience – which responded with laughter and applause – of the potentially offensive content. Meechan insists this was his very online way of annoying his girlfriend, who actually owned the dog. His supporters, including over a dozen Russian comedians, staged a benefit concert for him with the slogan: "a joke is not a crime." Found inside – Page 340I thought you had been in jail . INT . — Oh , no , sir ; not as bad as that . Where have you been yourself ? END . - Oh , I've been here , there and here . It just does. Comic sensation and internationally known movie star, Mo Nique brings her unique brand of humor to the most unlikely of places a women's correctional facility in Ohio. Keith Robinson: 7/10 Melanin. But he'd definitely figure it all out, and befriend people who would compliment weaknesses. And if I'm not familiar with a comedian's work and personality, I can't really make predictions about how they'd fare in here. In 1997, British comedian, Stephen Fry, who was no stranger to trouble as a young adult, was arrested for credit card fraud after stealing credit cards and making purchases. It's a compliment. Found inside – Page 226The Stooges must get their father-in-law (Tyrell) out of jail and apparently, the father is a prison warden who has been overthrown and put behind bars by ... Or dudes of any color. Demeanor, IQ, appearance, respect; all beneficial to smooth living in the joint. Throughout his lifetime, Lenny Bruce was the type of comedian who didn’t care what anyone said or thought about him. He's smart and intuitive enough to figure out the benefits of paying someone to look out for him. He could fly under the radar or just be guarded with the info. She can do no wrong. Need to see more material. Matteo Lane: 5/10 Prison life is tough for openly gay men. Luenell Reveals That She Went to Jail For Robbing a Bank Before Becoming a Famous Comedian. Tough Crowd alum. Found inside – Page 300Thurmond is picked up the sheriff , and all his dreams of fame come to nothing but jail time . The comedy - drama was directed by the young and promising ... Neal Brennan: 5/10 Connection to Chappelle would mean less in prison than in Hollywood. Regular on Tough Crowd. Patton Oswalt: 2-3/10 Struggled with this one. Brad Williams: 6/10 No one would mistreat him based on his size. Fortunately the shit that kills you isn't in here anymore. We jail our comedians on the internet now, in the court of public sensitivity. But starting in the 1980s, he became as much an activist as his political humor would have suggested. Bill Burr: 7/10 Not physically imposing but a redhead. What follows are my best guesses, and broad generalizations, of how the best standup comedians, from every era, and every genre, would fare should they ever find themselves in the Michigan Department Of Corrections...had they never been rich or famous.